Today was one of those days. Truly, nothing awful happened. I was just annoyed. It was nothing that an epic sized caramel classic lite couldn't fix.
Sometimes the monotony of motherhood can be a little much. It just seemed that what I do doesn't matter. Why do they need me so much? Why do they always run to me with a problem, even if their father is sitting right there? Don't they see that I just got the kitchen clean and now they want something to eat? I have to wash all of Anna's undies again because she can't figure out the potty situation. It is not fair that I am stuck here folding laundry while my husband gets to talk to other adults and use his brain all day. And so on and so on. When I told Mark that I need to go to Friedrich's by myself with a good book after supper, he immediately said OK (with a very concerned look in his eyes). I guess they prayed for me while I was gone.
For the past couple years, I have been trying to focus on this: "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." - Philippians 4:8 When I let little annoyances grow into big lies, I go back to this verse. On these days, I know that it is a battle for my mind. I tell myself to focus on the truth.
What I do does matter, very much so. They run to me because I am the mom. I take care of them, nurture them, and guide them. I am molding their souls as I take care of their everyday needs. That is my job, a very high calling. That is something to think about. That is honorable, just, pure, lovely, gracious, excellent, and praise worthy.